I'd be laughing if it hadn't belonged to me

Last night as I was sitting peacefully in the common room, actively ignoring my deteriorating health (welcome to cold & flu season, cough wheeze) and knitting*, there was a sudden huge and unpleasant boom, crash and tinkling in the kitchen. After a few minutes, my roommate (we'll call him "J") came in and explained.

Apparently, his girlfriend (whom we'll call "T" and also lives with us) wanted him to cook this chunk of turkey for her. It seems they have an arrangement where he does all the cooking and she complains about the dishes. Anyway, we're out of butter which he usually uses liberally in his cooking, but there was some urgency to the turkey-cooking which precluded him from running out to get more. So the turkey was roasting away in 11x9 glass pan which is more for, say, brownies than it is for roasting. But I digress. So he was checking the bird and decided he would use a little milk to help brown the bird since, as he pointed out again, we were out of butter and couldn't do things the way he wanted to. Of course, the pouring of cold milk from the fridge onto a hot bird in a glass pan is not the best of ideas, which he learned when the glass exploded, spraying the oven, part of the kitchen, and J with chunks and shards of glass, as well as hot turkey juice and grease.

Being short on patience and already frustrated, this sent him over the edge, which is to say that he had to walk away, leaving the mess to cool with his temper, and describing the situation to me in the context of his puzzlement that T was now frustrated with him for not finishing the bird.

I relay all this to you as the latest example of the dysfunction in their relationship, as well as to mourn the loss of my brownie pan. And, to express my own annoyance that the kitchen was in the exact same state this morning as I left for work, complete with a now-room-temperature hunk of turkey flesh laying on top of the stove.

Any guesses as to whether it will be cleaned up when I get home tonight?

*I'll save this footnote for a full post in the near future.