Green eggs and spam

I just took a break from cleaning out my fridge (since I'm going to be gone for a few weeks and I can't rely on my roommate to monitor the sanitary situation in the kitchen) to sign on and check my e-mail and futz around online for a little bit. Now, I have an e-mail address just about everywhere you can imagine (aol, gmail, yahoo, hotmail, etc.) so checking email can be somewhat time-consuming. Especially since finding the few important messages buried amongst the bajillion junk messages requires some effort. Basically, I kept signing up for different accounts because the previous one was getting hard to manage as the spammers found me.

I'm sure you're all as good as I am at spotting and deleting the announcements about penile enlargement systems, career advancement advice, mortgage rate reductions, requests for account information, hot teen school girl lesbian action, Nigerian investors, and septic system chemical ads, without even opening them anymore. But occasionally a particularly cleverly disguised one gets through, and every once in a while I'll open one on purpose just to satisfy my curiosity given the sender or the subject line. And there's that underlying fear that I might delete a legitimate attempt to contact me from some long-lost person whose e-mail address I might not recognize.

And so this evening, sitting in my inbox was a single such ambiguous message from a potentially valid e-mail address with the subject: "I'm so glad I found you!" Of course I opened it and of course it was spam. I was greeted by a picture of a bare-breasted blonde holding a hand-written note saying "I love Zach". Demographics aside, holy freakin' crap are they getting good at targeting junk mail in very specific ways. It makes me wonder if this woman sat there snapping photos all day long with notes for Bill and John and Yuri and Amichi and Julio...

The best part though? The website it's promoting is called "Coochiejar"