Gesundheit

I'm not generally one to talk about things that take place in the bathroom, mostly to spare myself (and you too, my dears) from unpleasant mental images involving people we know. But I will allow exceptions since I'm a dumbass. And occasional discussions on office-place restroom etiquette can be the source of much humor... or horror, depending. For example, every office has an unpublished, yet widely circulated, list of "bolters" - those who leave without washing hands. Word gets around. That's the horror. On the humor side, now that I think of it, here's a lovely little test of innate male bathroom etiquette that invariably guys will ace and women will not. Very enlightening.

Anyway, so for the last few weeks, almost every time I'm standing in the office bathroom (do not use your imagination here), thinking it's empty (since there are only two urinals, the only time you're allowed to use it is when it's empty... see the link above), I'll suddenly hear a "wah-chshhh" noise behind me, sounding just like someone stifling a sneeze. Yes, one time I even said "Bless you." It was involuntary. I fled immediately before anyone could recognize my shoes. Still, several times a week could Sneezy Dwarf be lurking in the stall?

Today, I caught the culprit in the act. Meet the Microburst 3000 AutoFresh Metered Air Freshener.