As if you needed any more reason not to live in Florida...

Farewell to the official 2005 Atlantic hurricane season! And what better way to see it off than with the formation of named storm number 26, Tropical Storm Epsilon. Take a moment to marvel at the facts, friends. Among this year's records:

• 26 named storms (obliterating the previous record of 21 in 1933)
• 14 full-blown hurricanes (beating out the 12 set in 1969)
• 4 major hurricanes hitting the U.S. (previous record: 3 in 2004)
• 3 category 5 storms: Katrina, Rita & Wilma (previous record: 2 in 1960 & 1961)
• 7 Tropical Storms before August 1 (previous record: 5 in 1997)
• 5 named storms in July (previous record: 4)
• Costliest Hurricane: Katrina ($100 billion+) (previous record Andrew, $26.5 billion - 1992 dollars)
• Deadliest U.S. Hurricane since 1928: Katrina (at least 1,300)
• Strongest Hurricane ever recorded in the Atlantic Basin: Wilma 882 millibars (mb) (previous record: Gilbert at 888 mb)
• Three of the six strongest hurricanes on record: Wilma 882 mb (1st), Rita 897 mb (4th), Katrina 902 mb (6th)
• Hurricane Vince ultimately became the first known tropical cyclone to make landfall in Spain.

There are other, mostly arbitrary records that were broken, but I'm done typing. Yes, we're all doomed. But despite all the evidence of it elsewhere, I'm not willing to chalk these doozies up to global warming. And you know, I'm an expert.